Does it Spark Joy? Applying the KonMari Method beyond the home

Photo credit to www.konmari.com

Hello my loyal readers! It has felt so much like Spring this week where I live and it has made me so happy. I like to think I love all seasons equally, but Spring is a special time in my opinion. The sun comes out, the flowers bloom, and it is like you see the world move from black and white to full color. For me it sparks lots of joy!

The phrase “Sparks Joy” was used a lot in 2019 after Tidying Up with Marie Kondo premiered on Netflix. For me I was introduced to Marie Kondo and her book The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up a few years before she had her season on Netflix, and established one of the most used sayings in 2019.

I was first introduced to the KonMari method in 2017 prior to moving back to North Carolina. I finally got around to reading the book towards the end of that year, and devoured it in just a few days. It is hands down one of the best self-help books I have ever read! At the end of 2018 I decided to re-read it since my partner was moving in with me that next year, and I needed to make some space happen in my home.

This post is not fully meant to layout the KonMari method, or tell you all the highlights from the book. There have been a lot of blog posts written about the method and peoples journeys through it. Instead I wanted to focus on how this book about decluttering my house, helped me look at different areas of my life and helped me start transforming them as well.

Relationships with People

As I went through my stuff from the many years since I went to college, it made me really look at my friendships and connections with people as a whole and how they have changed over time throughout my life.

Growing up I always wanted to have a lot of friends. When I was in middle and high school I constantly wanted to be surrounded by friends, be invited to all the awesome sleepovers, and have the biggest birthday bashes.

When applying the KonMari method to this area of my life, I really thought about which friendships fill me up, as well as the ones I wanted to dedicate energy to and to be a part of my life. Lets face it, life is very busy at times and sometimes we have limited hours to give to our social network.

When the KonMari Method walked into my life in 2017 and I started applying it in 2018, I was in a state of processing a lot of grief. Even though the life I was creating for myself was everything I wanted, I still had to let go of some of the past, even if it was just past version of me.

Throughout my twenties, when I would find myself moving forward to a different phase of life I used to feel this obligation to take everyone I had ever known and met with me. This is an unrealistic expectation though.

“People come into our life to teach us lessons, to help us shape parts of ourselves. They come into our lives to break us down so we or somebody else can build us up.”

Moving forward in life and not taking someone with you isn’t a bad thing. It doesn’t mean or signify that they were not important to you and that you don’t care about them anymore or their well being. Sometimes growing apart and going your separate ways is just part of life.

Career Goals

Like so many people I compare myself to others my age or who have had similar stories or journeys. In all the areas of life I feel like the one I compare most often with is when it comes to my career.

Since my graduation from graduate school I have remained connected with a lot of my cohort mates through social media and LinkedIn. I am honored and proud to have such a wide array of colleagues in all areas of Higher Education, and beyond. Some of them are starting their Doctorate Programs, some are already Associate and Assistant Directors, and some have received incredible awards of recognition at places they work.

Often times I have found myself comparing my post graduate school journey to theirs, and if I should be in a different place in my career than I am right now.

When I think about what brought me to higher education, and what my overall dreams are when it comes to my career, it doesn’t really fit into a neat traditional role in the system of higher education.

I have thought about Doctorate programs, applied to higher level jobs, and looked into submitting articles for publication. Typically these thoughts have been out of a feeling of thinking that it was something I had to or should want to do. It was never fully out of the feeling of wanting to actually do and follow through with it.

“What makes me happy ad joyful in my work is going to look different than someone I went to school with, and that is okay. Finding joy in what I do most hours of the week is more important because that is what differentiates a job to a career. “

There is no one size fits all when it comes to career goals and what it should look like.

Personal Interests and Hobbies

Out of all the areas I was able to apply to the KonMari method to, this is the one that I am really proud of.

I was involved in a Multi-Level Marketing (MLM) company for a few years between 2016-2019. When it first entered my life it brought me joy and connection, which is something I was desperately needing at the time. As I moved back home to NC, and started flourishing in my personal life, I realized that being involved with the MLM company wasn’t the way it used to be for me anymore.

“It made me feel heavier instead of lighter.”

It was through the KonMari Method that I discovered how big of a burden being in the MLM company was to me, both spiritually and financially. I realized how it made me feel like I had to do and be somebody I didn’t want to be. After I realized this, I meditated and talked with my finance and best friend about leaving it. In the fall of 2019 I was able to cancel my subscription, and it has been uphill since then in regards to my happiness in this area of life.

There was a part of me that was disappointed in myself for getting involved in an MLM company, as well as the fact it didn’t work out for me. However, it freed up space for me to think about my interests and hobbies differently.

Our interests and hobbies should be something that lifts us up and rejuvenates us. Not be something that brings us down.

With applying the KonMari Method to these three areas of life, there was a sense and need of obligation I had to start working on overcoming to apply the method outside the home.

We hold on to stuff because we feel obligated because of how much we spent on it, who gave it to us, and what that item signifies. We hold on so tightly because we are not open to moving forward and transforming into who we are maybe really wanting to become and be.

“Process that past, give gratitude for it and how it shaped you, and then let it go.”

The only obligation we need to focus on is what makes us happy and feels us with warmth inside. This not only applies to the stuff we have, but how we live our life on the daily basis.

If it doesn’t fill you up then maybe it isn’t meant for you.

Until next time,